It took me a staggering 33 years and a labyrinth of self-denial to reach the beautiful oasis of radical self-acceptance. For much of my life, I battled the ever-persistent voice in my head that whispered, "You're too much," or "You're not enough." I'm not alone in this; the struggle with self-acceptance is one of the most universal human experiences.
Let me paint a vivid picture of who I am today: I'm the guy rocking colorful glasses, adorned in funky Florida shirts that would give Don Johnson a run for his money. I wear bright colors as if I'm a walking, talking prism, breaking light into an array of spectacular hues. My smile? It's so huge it could eclipse the sun. My hair might be short, but my energy is boundless. I'm so enthusiastic and energetic that I make a double shot of espresso seem like chamomile tea.
Yes, I am weird to many—and wonderfully so. I live and breathe encouragement, exuding it like a potent perfume that attracts positivity and wards off naysayers. It's not merely an attitude; it's an essence, a core principle guiding every fiber of my being.
The Shackles of Self-Denial
Before embracing my quirks, I wore an armor of self-denial. This armor was forged from societal norms, peer pressures, and the cultural message that to fit in was to succeed. I felt compelled to dilute my personality, dim my vibrant colors to monochromatic tones, and basically clip my wings because they were too dazzling for the world.
Like a chameleon, I adapted to what I thought others expected of me. I presented a version of myself that was palatable to them, but anathema to my inner being. Every time I dulled my sparkle to blend in, I chipped away at my essence, losing a part of me in the grand quest to be 'normal.' But what is normal other than a setting on a washing machine?
The Epiphany: Radical Self-Acceptance
The shift towards radical self-acceptance didn't occur overnight. It was a journey punctuated by introspection, emotional archeology, and a series of epiphanies that helped me excavate my authentic self from the debris of conformity. The linchpin was the realization that I have the ultimate authority over my self-worth. Not society, not my peer group, and certainly not the voice in my head that occasionally screams insecurities.
I decided to love myself unconditionally, weirdness and all. I recognized that my uniqueness wasn't a bug; it was a feature. In a world obsessed with conforming, my quirks became my superpowers. It's liberating to wake up every morning and realize that you are enough just as you are. The person staring back at you in the mirror doesn't need a filter; they need to be loved, celebrated, and accepted with open arms and a heart full of grace.
A Call to Action: Embrace Your 'Weird'
If you're reading this, here's my call to action: dig deep to figure out who you are and love your weirdness too. Give yourself the freedom to be unapologetically you. Peel off the layers of self-denial, societal pressure, and preconceived notions.
And speaking of weirdness, did you know that the word 'weird' has roots going back to the 1400s? It comes from the Old English word 'wyrd,' meaning 'having the power to control fate.' Isn't that fantastic? By accepting your own unique weirdness, you're essentially taking control of your fate. You're reclaiming your narrative, scripting your story, and directing your life's movie.
So, what are you waiting for? Reclaim your weird. Relish it, own it, and wear it like a badge of honor because when you control your weirdness, you control your destiny.
Go forth, be weird, and be spectacularly you!
Really good article Phil. You may have the basis for an interesting book here.
(Also, I was reminded of Frank Herbert's Dune series which talks of the "weirding way". I wonder if that is a hat-tip to "wyrd"?)
Appreciate your sincere and authentic presence and the courage to share and encourage! I appreciate you Phil