Welcome to this enlightening episode of "The Happy AF Show," where your host, Phil Gerbyshak, dives into a profound conversation with Tara Rolstad about the balancing act of mastering self-care and parenting in pursuit of happiness. Tara, a mental health expert and advocate, shares her personal journey and insights, emphasizing the importance of self-care, especially for those parenting children with mental health challenges.
Episode Highlights:
- Tara's Unconventional Start: Tara begins by recounting the worst advice she ever received, which ironically propelled her towards resilience and determination. This moment of adversity underscores the importance of self-awareness and self-motivation in navigating life's unexpected challenges.
"The worst advice I ever got...if you don't work harder, you're never going to be a good secretary...what not that there's anything wrong with being a good secretary, but sir, that's not what I'm here for."
- Journey into Mental Health Advocacy: Tara shares her compelling story of becoming a foster parent to her nieces, who suffered from severe mental health issues, alongside raising her children. This experience deepened her commitment to mental health advocacy and underscored the pervasive nature of mental health challenges across families.
"By the time they got to us, they had really severe mental health issues...what I've discovered is that it's a lot of families."
- The Balancing Act of Self-Care and Parenting: Tara discusses the delicate balance between caring for oneself and caring for others, emphasizing the need for identifying personal non-negotiables in self-care. For Tara, sleep is paramount.
"It is 100% a balancing act, but not a balancing act that I never expect to get fully balanced."
- Self-Care Strategies: Tara delves into practical strategies for self-care, highlighting the significance of sleep, establishing a support network, and engaging in activities that rejuvenate the spirit. She advocates for countercultural approaches to parenting and self-care, stressing the importance of allowing children to develop self-sufficiency.
"My non-negotiable was sleep...I learned very early on that I had to get my nine hours every night."
- Encouragement for Parents: Tara offers encouragement and practical advice for parents navigating their own mental health while supporting their children. She emphasizes the importance of seeking help when needed and fostering a supportive community.
"One in five kids every year is going to struggle with a mental health issue...it's important that parents are aware of this."
Key Takeaways:
- Self-Care is Personal - and Essential: Understanding and honoring your non-negotiables in self-care is crucial for maintaining mental health and well-being.
- Support Networks Matter: Building and maintaining a support network is vital for navigating the challenges of parenting, especially when mental health issues are involved.
- Education and Advocacy: Tara's journey underscores the importance of educating oneself about mental health and advocating for those who are struggling.
- Encouragement to Seek Help: It's okay to seek professional help when self-care is not enough. Therapy and medication can be essential tools in managing mental health.
More Resources:
- Tara Rolstad's Website: For more insights and resources from Tara, visit http://tararolstad.com.
- Self-Care Handout: A comprehensive guide to self-care strategies and practices, available here, just for listeners of The Happy AF Show!
Closing Thoughts:
Tara's journey and insights offer a powerful reminder of the importance of self-care, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting children with mental health challenges. Her message encourages us to seek balance, prioritize our well-being, and embrace the support of our communities. Remember, taking care of yourself isn't just about being a better parent or partner—it's about honoring your inherent worth and ensuring you can live a fulfilling and happy life.
Thank you, Tara, for sharing your wisdom and experiences with us. Your resilience and dedication to mental health advocacy inspire us all to approach life's challenges with courage and compassion.
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